Couldn’t find a notebook

A few random thoughts.

I’m going to restart this streak. I’ve been “logging in” but not logging any food for about a week or more now. I’m also stalled on my weight loss. These two things are not unrelated.

I want to start counting my calories weekly instead of daily. For several months I’ve been drinking 1/2 a gallon of milk a week, and some weeks I finish it on Tuesday and some weeks I finish it Sunday morning before I go grocery shopping. But I only allow myself one half gallon every week. I feel like this could work for other things, like chocolate chips. And sardines. Until I figure out how I want to do this, I’m going to go back to daily logging and eating the things that are good for me.

I ran on Saturday. I ran and I walked. I walk/ran to the track, and then I did a few laps at the track that I would run the straights and walk the curves, and then when my hip started to bother me, I stopped and I walked home. It was a lot of fun. The first half of the laps I did, I just jogged the straights. The second half I sprinted them. I think that might be what bothered my hip. It was fun anyway. There was a woman there who was running so much faster than me, and only once stopping to walk. It was amazing. I want to be like her someday. At one point she came up and I started running just as she was about to lap me for the 4th or 5th time. I wonder if she thought that I thought we were racing. She would be right. In my head we were racing. But she was winning.

I want to do that again tonight, but I am planning on just walking and talking with my sister, and running after if I feel like it.

I want to find someone who has hiked Tunk Mountain so they can tell me about it. I want to do it, and then I want to swim afterwards, because this sounds like a lot of fun.

I can’t wait to go back to the weight room. I am having so much fun lifting. Running is a halfway decent substitute when I can’t get three days of lifting in, but I’d always rather be lifting, no matter what I’m doing.

 

“You’re an inspiration”

I have dreaded writing this post.

It’s been eating away at me for weeks.

There’s this woman at work who keeps telling me things like, “You’re so inspiring!” and “I could never do what you do.” I don’t even know how to react to someone saying something like that. I think a lot about how my shyness probably comes across as bitchiness (which of course just makes me shyer, because I perpetually feel like I’ve offended someone). Now there’s someone paying me compliments that I don’t even think are true, and I don’t want to be similarly misunderstood. We work in the same general area, but not together, so I may see her everyday for two weeks and then not again for a month. I don’t know if I should just ask her to stop talking about my weight/progress — even though she isn’t saying anything mean! — or just learn to live with it.

I get that it’s my issue, my hangup, I should be the one to change … but how?

Let me ‘splain. No there is too much. Let me sum up.

Good things come to those who work their butts off and never give up.

I’ve been a terrible blogger, but in good news, I was a fantastic Paleo-Challenge-r.

I forget how much I weighed when I started the Paleo Challenge 30 days ago, but as of this morning I weighed 202.2 pounds. That’s almost 30 pounds since I started this blog, and almost none of it was lost before I started Crossfit and almost none of it was lost before I started the Paleo Challenge. Not only was I eating strict Paleo, I also stuck to a Zone diet that kept my carbs below 100 grams a day. I lost 12 pounds the first week. I was miserable. But I got past it.

Nate was incredibly patient with me. I know I was not easy to live with. And more than just Nate, my friends, my coworkers, everyone who had to deal with me at the beginning of the month deserves something special. I couldn’t have done it without their encouragement/tolerance.

Today marked 31 days since the Paleo Challenge started, and my friends treated me to doughnuts and peanut butter and Pepsi Max and all the things I miss. I made a feast for dinner tonight full of comfort food. I miss cooking and feeling inspired by my ingredients. I don’t have the attention span for crochet or knitting anymore; my most relied-upon creative outlet anymore is my cooking. I won’t pig out like I did today for every cheat (I plan on having one every 1-2 weeks), but my sanity and progress towards my goal depends on having some. And when I have them, they’re going to be great. They’re going to be comfort foods. They’re going to be love. And I deserve it.

Although this was a 30 Day Challenge, it’s officially not over until next Monday. I’ll post with all my new measurements and non-numerical progress (including the reason for the best present I could have imagined from my BFF). I enjoyed my splurges today, but I’m absolutely ready to get back on the wagon and to finish slaying the monster I let myself turn into. I made huge progress this month, and I’m not done yet.

Step 1: Don’t be a nag

I bit my tongue when Nate came home from work. My first impulse was to ask him if he was ready for the gym, because I’ve been chomping at the bit since 11. My BFF that I signed up for Weight Watchers with asked if I wanted to go since we both had the day off. As tempted as I was to go with her, I decided against it. If I didn’t wait for Nate, who knows when he’d go again, and if I tried to do a two-a-day, I probably would just hurt myself. Not that I don’t think I’ll ever do a two-a-day, but not right now.

But without any prompting, he came home from work, went upstairs and changed into his new gym gear, so I changed into mine. My phone is about 80% charged, so I asked if we could wait a little while for it to get fully charged. Then he laid down for a nap. Silly boy 🙂

Stay tuned for the post-workout update …